My Public Apology:
Hello all! First of all, thank you so much for all of your support, love, and kindness over the years! I truly appreciate you! There has been some new-ness going on in my life, and there are some things that I would like to express from my heart. So, here it goes!
In the past, (including in old photos, music videos, and Youtube videos) you seen parts of the old me. God has made, and is still making, changes within me. I sincerely apologize for showing too much up top, for wearing dresses and skirts that were simply too short, and for wearing shirts and tops that bared so much skin. My attire was lustful: I was not providing a good example, especially for your children, and I am sure that I caused people to stumble.
As a Christian woman (who was not walking with Jesus Christ back then the way I should have been), I did not always properly represent God. Having said that: I also sincerely apologize if I have ever caused any confusion within any of you about God, Christians in general, or Christianity. Please do not allow my personal mistakes to alter your thoughts and feelings about all Christians or God; it was me who misrepresented Jesus Christ, and it was me who made my mistakes—and now, I am correcting my wrongs. I do not say this arrogantly at all: I sincerely apologize if I caused anyone to stumble into having lustful thoughts.
I apologize for at times carrying myself in ways that was contradictory to who I truly am as a woman, as a lady, and spiritually as a child of God. Again, that could certainly cause spiritual confusion for some of you, and if I caused confusion for any of you, again, I truly apologize.
God had me to realize that it is not about, "I don't care about what people think about me," and it is not about, "People should not judge me anyways! They should accept me for me!" It has nothing to do with those truths. However, here is the relevant truth: No matter how much you verbally and actively express your love for God, how much you love God, or how good your heart is—people can be thrown off by presentation! As a Christian woman, and as a woman in general, I need to present myself with virtue, self-respect, modesty, integrity, and wisdom. I am a loving person. However, I need to remember that part of loving others also means that I need to demonstrate my love for others by not causing them to stumble. I need to love everyone with the love of Jesus Christ. Part of a Christian's mission is to share with everyone God's love, the gospel of Jesus Christ, the power of the Holy Spirit. I realize that some people will not see my God-loving spirit past my lustful, revealing attire, and I truly understand this. Their souls are much more important than me trying to be "Miss Sexy." I want my OUTSIDE to reflect who I am INSIDE, and this is what God, you, and I can expect from now on, and I am happy about these changes! Praise God! :)
I am human, just like all of you. So, in the past, I did not always make the best decisions, including when it came to how I dressed. Though my attire was not super revealing, it still was not the most appropriate for a lady, especially a lady of God. I did not change to please man: I chose to make these wonderful changes to please GOD, so that I could walk in my purpose with my fullest potential (without the distractions of lustfulness and the confusion it caused), to be loving toward others by not causing them to stumble; and to improve myself as a Christian, woman, and human being.
I never want to be a part of anyone's (especially a child's) corruption. There is always a bigger picture. When you are in front of anyone, especially in the public eye in any way, people are watching, and people can be influenced by you. There is so much corruption out there in the world—and I do not want to be a part of it, in any way.
I've already begun the process of either removing old videos and photos or making them unavailable. If God leads me to make any more changes, respectfully, I will.
Below is something God placed on my heart to write. This explains some of why I am so happy with these positive changes! Giving ALL the Glory to God, may these words be a blessing to everyone who reads this! :)
Every now and then, a little girl will say to me, "I want to be just like you," "I want to look like you," "I want to dress like you," and so on. (I say all of this humbly.) My first reactions are to smile, thank that child, but then tell them that they are beautiful and encourage them to feel good about the person who God has created them to be. My next reactions lie within my thoughts: I would think to myself, "Why me?" and "I didn't know she paid that much attention to me." There came a point in my life where I would also feel guilty after hearing those girls' comments. (I will elaborate on that in a bit.)
Why am I telling you this? It is not at all to brag! I am telling you this because I never realized how much of an impact I/we could (and do) have on our children—even when we are doing the most simplest of things.
I had been spending time with a pre-teen girl (like a big sister), as her mother knew me and liked my character and felt that I was a good example for her daughter. At a certain point, I began to pay extra close attention to how much she watched me. I noticed something: She watched everything I did:
—How I did my makeup (I caught her looking at me through a reflection).
—How I dressed.
—How I interacted with people. (This includes how I responded to men when they would try to "talk" to me.)
—What kind of conversations I would be willing to have. (She tested me to see if I would participate in gossip with her, but I did not, as I do not gossip.)
—What my interests are.
—How I feel about God and my Christian walk.
One day, this young girl expressed to me that she wanted to wear tighter clothes. She said to me, "When I get older, I want to dress kind of like you." She smiled at me in admiration. She also had a look on her face that revealed to me that she had a hope within her that I would be happy with her words. That is where some of the guilt lies. By that time, I had already ditched my mid-drifts and the shorter dresses and skirts I once wore—but my clothing were still not as modest as they should have been. My cleavage was still showing, and my skirts and dresses could still stand to be a bit longer (and roomier because I could hardly walk at times). After that, I began to watch how I dressed when spending time with the youth.
Am I saying change your whole world and who you are? No. What I am saying is this: We need to be more aware of and cautious about how we present ourselves, how we speak, what we watch (on T.V. or the internet), what we listen to, how we interact with others, and so on, when around our children. Our children are the future!
When I am around a youth, I now ask myself: "Do I come off lady-like around her/him?" I no longer watch T.V., but when I watch a movie, when I am on Youtube, or when I am viewing my social media, I ask myself "What am I watching in front of her/him? Is this safe for them to watch? Do my choices of entertainment provide a bad example for them? Is my even being entertained by my particular choices of entertainment in itself providing a bad example for her/him?" When I interact with people around a child, I ask myself, "Am I representing a true woman of God correctly?" It is about self-awareness and consideration for the life and soul of another human being. Also, remember this: It is not just about what we choose to do around our children, but it is also about what we choose to not do around our children that could make a difference in a child's life.
It must be mentioned that you can also influence a child of the opposite gender of you! We need to be good examples for all children! For example, if a man has a daughter, he should be an example for her of how a man should treat a woman. How is he treating and speaking to women around his daughter? That little girl is watching. The same example goes for women who have sons. A woman should teach her son how a woman should be treated, not just by her words, but also by her own actions, and by what she allows and condones in her life. By the way, a child does not have to be your child for them to follow your lead!
Children remember. Children understand a lot more than we think they do, or give them credit for. Children are curious. Children are impressionable. Children sometimes mimic what we do, how we dress, and what we say. We should all be mindful and aware. Whether you know it or even like it or not—there is always someone connected to your life. It is a domino effect.
*THERE
IS ENOUGH CORRUPTION OUT THERE IN THE WORLD—DO NOT BE A PART OF THE
CORRUPTION.*
Conclusion:
It is important to take note of this: God is not asking us to be "fake" around certain people or the youth. If we are truly seeking to be and practicing being the best children of God, human beings, and examples that we can possibly be—then there is no need to pretend to be anything. Let God's Word, His love, His instructions, and the true definition of love (1 Corinthians 13:4-7), all become a real part of who you are.
Please, continue to trust in The Lord, Jesus Christ! Get to know God personally, for yourself, by reading His Holy Word! I promise you, it will change your life, in the best ways possible! In God's will is the most loving place you could ever be! Keep smiling! Have Faith! Laugh! Love! Forgive! Cherish one another! Love one another! Remember that God's will for you is perfect! You have purpose—it is the reason why you exist! I love you all, but God loves you best of all! May God bless you all abundantly! ♥
With Love and Service to Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ
Thank You for Your Time
Love Always,
Charrese Monique
P.S. My apology is not me condemning anyone. It is truly just me sincerely apologizing, sharing with you all the valuable life lessons that God has taught me, and sharing all else that God has placed on my heart to share with you—as I am led by the LORD. If something here speaks to you personally or touches your heart, do not ignore that! Please pray about it! God knows how to reach you and answer you in ways that He knows you will not miss!
Also, in the video below, my face is a little swollen. I was once on too many medications for Ulcerative Colitis (a condition I was born with) and its extra-intestinal manifestations, and I also once had an unhealthy diet that caused inflammation; but God got me off of those meds and guided me to eat healthy (praise God!) and my body was in the process of getting to a healthy state. (Praise God again!)
For more about my journey to modesty, please read:
Uplifting Message and Word of
The Day:
It is beautiful to have confidence (a humble confidence). It is definitely okay to want to feel beautiful or look beautiful. It is also nice to want to get dressed up, do your hair, and be admired by a special someone. However, you must remember this: Your character, your inner being, your heart, your spirit, your mind, and the final destination of your soul--are all to be focused on as well as worked on! They are all to be of high importance (your soul being priority) and cherished--by you and anyone who enters your life. Never neglect your personality, the awareness of how you make others feel, or the effect and influence that you certainly do have on others.
Cherish selflessness, love for others, love for who God has created you to be, virtue, and most importantly, God and having reverence for Him and His Word.
3 Whose
adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of
wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
4 But
let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even
the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great
price.
-1 Peter 3:3-4 (KJV)
With God's blessing, I will share this next version for a
more in depth translation.
3 Your
adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing
gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; 4 but let it be the
hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet
spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.
-1 Peter 3:3-4 (NASB)
Copyright 2017, Charrese Monique
All Rights Reserved.
